VERTIGO

A Reflection on U2's Song, Vertigo
You can listen to the song here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhWZ7bpfQag

Ver·ti·go \ˈvər-ti-ˌgō\
a dizzy confused state of mind

Lights go down, it's dark, the jungle is your head, it can't rule your heart
A feeling so much stronger than a thought...
I can't stand the beats...The girl with crimson nails has Jesus 'round her neck

As a homosexual man, my contingent reality is Love as a dark jungle overwhelming emotion and logic.
And as a deeply religious man, my homosexuality often chocked my faith in frustration, struggling to make sense of two seemingly incongruous entities. In an effort to help, voices attempted to eliminate one in favour of the other dismissing dialogue as compromise: Personal experiences are used as weapons against faith and faith is often used as an escape from genuine experiences.




...I'm at a place called Vertigo
It's everything I wish I didn't know
But you give me something I can feel

In my own meandering journey, I recognized value in a dissonant, no-holds-barred dialogue between the two, mutually questioning each other. My contingent reality must question faith's reasons for the parameters that it sets and why it cannot simply rubber-stamp the current trend. Yet experience must also be open to faith's scrutiny: What ultimately do I want? Who defines me and why?
Faith without experience is an ideological fantasy and experience without faith is an impotent hope.
With these two wings, one is assumed into that Love who is the source and summit of our innate restlessness.



Your love is teaching me how to kneel, kneel...